Introductions over a cup of tea

Hello (or "Bonjour"-- my french TA would be proud)! I'm Kat, and I have an eating disorder. EDNOS to be precise, though anorexia has never been far away and I've had occasional affairs with bulimia (especially exercise bulimia... which I kind of worship).

I've had an ED since my sophmore year of high school (that's when I began to restrict... but I'd been having what I like to call "fat feelings" since my freshman year, though I must have been 90-something pounds). That year, I also began to have reactions to wheat and dairy products so I cut those out of my diet for about 4 months... and ended up in the low-80s.

I was miserable (anxiety/ depression, which I was subsequently medicated for), but I was skinny. So skinny.

Then, like some twisted miracle, I could eat these things again! Thus, during my junior year I gained weight. I probably got up to the low-100s, but that felt high enough. I became a vegetarian in the middle of the year, and I was pleased to see my weight stabilize (though, to be clear, I became a vegetarian for the ANIMALS and not for weight loss), but I needed it lower so I started restricting again...

And I restricted into my senior year, and many days I actually felt like I was looking good! Not great, but good! Then, I became a vegan that February (for the animals... I read Skinny Bitch and it just about broke my heart) and I began to feel even better about myself-- inside (probably because of the lack of dairy) and out. It was wonderful.

And my weight slipped down, from the high 90s to the mid 90s to the low 90s... And then I was off to college (or "university" as most of the world seems to call it), and I'd last weighed in at 93.

Ah, the good ol' days.

I just finished my first semester at said college. It's extremely competitive and sells scrumptious vegan cookies... BUT the dining halls are committed to offering healthy vegan options and I walk at least a couple of miles up and down hills everyday getting to and from class.

But, alas, when I left to come home after winter break I was a whopping 102 lbs.

And I'm 5'2. I'm SHORT... so this weight is not nearly as low as it seems. In fact, it's happily settled in the "normal" BMI range, which is not where I want to be.

Well, it appears I've finished my tea, so I suppose this introduction is over. However, you're free to ask my any questions you have (comment or email me at karnii@live.com).

Also, feel free to check out the blog that I started... my junior year? Sophmore?

http://toastick.wordpress.com/

A demain,

Kat